what a dream I had

You are held captive by a mad scientist in a dimly lit castle decorated like a cluttered, late 1970s rec room. As you enter the main drawing room, you suddenly spot what seems to be a basilisk. Horrified, you squeeze your eyes tight shut, until the mad scientist says to you, "Have no fear, my prisoner. The crocheted basilisk is not dangerous. It is the knitted basilisk you must be afraid of."

If this ever happens in your dreams, you can probably be sure of one or more of the following:

1. You spend way too much time knitting.
2. You have read Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets recently, or too many times. Or both.
3. You saw this in a library book:



And were duly frightened. You find out later in the book that the dear snake pictured above is, in fact, Crispin the Crocheted Cobra, but I must confess upon first sighting I was more inclined to think of him as "Sammy the Serpent of Satan". But that's just me.

And yes, I really had that dream.